My Baby's Baby

There's a new baby in my house, but good thing, it's just a toy.  Evie received a baby doll for Christmas from a little friend at daycare.  I was amazed at how quickly she took to "taking care" of her baby. 

Giving Baby a hug.

Baby does not have a name; we just call her "Baby."  (It makes me feel very "Dirty Dancing."  M and I joke about not putting Baby in a corner.  It's tons of fun.)  Evie loves to hug, kiss, and feed Baby.  She also reads books to her in our rocking chair. 

I was actually a little hesitant about the doll at first.  I've tried to limit the amount of princess-y pink things that Evie has.  I honestly don't really know why.  I was never a super girly-girl, and I just want Evie to play with whatever she wants to play with, not be bound to playing with Barbies and (God forbid) Bratz dolls just because she's a girl.  Then I saw how much she genuinely loves this doll.  I guess that's what she wants to play with.  :)

Evie putting Baby in the stroller. She always buckles her in.  Safety first!

M's parents gave Evie a doll stroller when they found out how much she loves Baby.  It's so cute to watch her strap baby into the stroller and cruise around the basement with her.  She also likes to take her grocery shopping. 

Shopping sans Baby, but Baby often goes with her.

I just love seeing Evie's imagination beginning to come to life.  I guess if a doll has helped that, maybe they aren't all bad.  :)

P.S.  I apologize again for the terrible picture quality.  Our camera in on the fritz, and my phone camera is ok, but not great.  Oh, and I am a terrible photographer.  I promise I'll get better soon. 

The perks of having a little girl

So, I've written before that I was scared to death of having a daughter.  I was so sure that I wanted a boy so that I didn't have to deal with all of the "girl" stuff (friend issues, periods, boyfriend issues, Barbie dolls, etc.)  Obviously, now that I have a daughter, I've gotten over it for the most part.  All of that girly stuff still scares the bejesus out of me, but we'll get through it.

One of the major perks about having a girl is all of the absolutely amazingly cute clothing out there for little girls.  I frequent Target and Kohl's (mostly for the prices), but I have also been known to make a pretty big dent at Old Navy.  Here are a few pictures of my favorite of Evie's outfits from the past 18 months.  Captions include the brand/store where they are from.

Dress from Kohl's

Dress from Target

Dress from Target

I realized that I don't have many good pictures of some of my favorite outfits from the past few months.  I've been really into leggings and boots.

Boot from Target, Shirt and pants from Kohl's

 This is the best picture that I have of "the boots."  (She likes to try to climb into the fridge whenever it's open.) 

I enjoy dressing my daughter up much more that I thought I would while I was pregnant.  I was horrified by all of the pink clothing back then, and the boots probably would have made me feel a little vomit-y.  I'm not a super girly-girl...but oh, how the whole world changes once you have a child!!  ;)







Want to link up your cute/favorite outfits??  Link up with Mama G at Growing up Geeky!

Cinderella Ate My Daughter - Book Review

I've noticed it since Evie was born.  They're everywhere....the Disney Princesses, Toddlers & Tiaras, padded bras in the girl's (for ages 5 - 10) section  of Target... It seems like girls are expected to grow up so much more quickly these days.  Even before Evie was born, I was amazed when I first started teaching by how much more mature the middle school girls seemed than when I was their age.  Seriously, some of these girls had more cleavage at 13 than I had at 23!  

Cinderella Ate My Daughter by Peggy Orenstein (HaperCollins, 2011) dives into the world of the "girlie-girl culture" that has overtaken the United States in the past decade.  Orenstein give great statistics about the marketing of everything from toys to sexuality and how it affects girls as they grow up.  This book was informative both as the mother of a daughter, as well as the teacher of teenage girls.

Orenstein is the mother of a school age daughter.  She has written several books on girls' development, and became especially disturbed by the push for girls to become older at younger ages when her daughter developed an obsession with all things "princess."  She questions whether or not the princess thing is even all that bad.  After all, the Disney princesses (Cinderella, Ariel, Belle, Pocahontas, Snow White, etc.) are all "good" girls.  However, they are all completely dependent on their man.  The author points out that Ariel even gives up her own voice to get her man!

Orenstein also explores toy marketing, Toddlers & Tiaras (the TLC reality show about little girls in beauty pageants), young pop stars (Britney Spears both pre- and post-breakdown, Miley Cyrus, etc.), and the wonderful world of Facebook.  In the 21st century there is so much more marketing to kids at younger and younger ages.  What was popular with 13 year olds in 2000, is what's popular for 8 year olds in 2011. 

As a mom, this book mostly scared me.  The author gives great facts, but is scarce on how to face these problems.  It is true that girls are usually pigeon-holed into one of two categories: the girly-girl, or the tomboy, but I didn't feel like there are any great suggestions as to how to combat this.  The author struggles with how to get her daughter to just be herself.  I think that's something that most parents battle.

In the end, Orenstein's own daughter outgrows the princess phase and moves on to other obsessions, as most kids usually do.  I would recommend this book for anyone who is interested in learning facts about marketing  and its effects on children, especially girls.  More than anything, this book has  made me more aware of all of the girly-ness out there.

I'm climbing on TBB! Thanks for the votes!! A few more wouldn't hurt! ;)

Top 100 Songs of the 2000s

I LOVE VH1's countdown shows.  Their "I love the 80s" and "I love the 90s" are great too.  M and I were watching VH1's Top 100 Songs of the 2000s the other day, and reminiscing about all of the songs from when we were in college.  Evie was dancing with us to "Hey Ya" by Outkast.



It was adorable!  I don't think it's possible to not dance to that song.

Another dance favorite from back in the day was "Yeah" by Usher ft. Lil Jon and Ludacris.  To this day, whenever I hear this song, I have flashbacks to being incredibly hung-over, attempting to take a philosophy quiz with this song banging in my head....ah, to be young again.  :)



The whole list just brought back great memories.  I was kind of surprised that "Crazy in Love" by Beyoncé ft. Jay-Z was #1.  I thought that some of the other songs on the list were more influential, but I suppose it just depends on who is choosing the songs.

M and I have pretty strong opinions about music.  When we found out that I was pregnant, M made it his goal to make sure that our child only listen to "good" music.  Of course, that is by his standards, so other people would probably disagree.  I can picture Evie now: she will be the only 5 year old in kindergarten who can sing the entire 2-disc set "The Essential Willy Nelson."  Wow...writing that I realized that our poor kid doesn't stand a chance at being cool.  Oh well, I'm sure she'll thank us for is someday!!  ;)

I thought it would be different

In the past, I've alluded to my rocky relationship with my mom, but lately it's been worse.  I have no reason to feel major angst towards her, she was not abusive, neglectful, selfish, unreasonable, or in any way a bad mother.  We just don't really ever see eye to eye.

When I was in high school, it was at its worst.  Obviously, that's not unusual; many teenagers and parents don't get along.  When I went to college, something changed.  In high school, we never really just talked.  My freshman year of college, we could talk on the phone for 30 - 45 minutes without any awkwardness.  I was so happy that I finally had the relationship with my mom that I had always wanted.  It just took time, and maturity on my part. As time went on, we've slipped back into our old roles though.  It's hard to just talk to her most days.  I feel like we don't have much in common, and I feel like she's very judgmental of me and M. 

While I was pregnant I hoped that becoming a mother would bring me and my mom closer again.  I've been disappointed that it hasn't.  I want to be able to talk to her about anything and everything.  We're both part of the "mom" club now.  We've both given birth, dealt with newborn sleep deprivation and colicky babies, and been through all of those rites of passage that come with having a baby.

But nothing has changed.  Some days it bugs me more than others.  I wish that I could just get over it and realize that she and I will never have that mother/daughter "best friend" type of relationship.  It's hard because I think deep down, we both want that.  We're just too different to know how to create that relationship with each other. 

I could delve into all of the ways this scares me about my future relationship with my own daughter, but that's another post for another day.  I should feel lucky that my mom is still in my life, a lot of people don't have that.  I need to take our relationship for whatever it's worth, and try to develop the best relationship I can with my own daughter.

Football Widow? No, I have a child to distract me.

I saw this in the paper today, and I couldn't help but relate.

"Real Life Adventures" Comic Strip from 11/5/11

 M loves football.  It goes beyond the usual "fan" and become fanaticism.  He will watch any game, big or small, whether or not he cares about the teams.  He likes some teams better than others (Miami and *obviously* Wisconsin for college teams, and Philadelphia and Green Bay for NFL), but overall as long as it's football, he'll watch it.  

Most of the time, this doesn't bother me.  Before I married him I knew that I would not have control of the remote from the Saturday morning ESPN Gameday coverage through the Monday night football game.  But some days....aaaarrrrrgggghhh!!!

It's become a joke between us and our families that I'm technically single from late August through early February.    My brother-in-law even got me this as a gift for Christmas when he had my name a few years ago.

It's a decorative throw pillow.
BARF!!!

On days like today, when I'd rather slowly drive a dull pencil into my eye socket than watch even one more play, it's nice to have a child around to distract me.  It was a gorgeous day outside, so Evie and I took a long walk with the dog.  I also caved and gave her one of her Christmas presents.  (She'll never know that today isn't Christmas.  ;)  Right??)

Crayola Adventure Dome Child Kids Play Tunnel Tent Giga...

I really just wanted to see her play in it, and M wasn't around to stop me.  She loved it!  Tomorrow, while M is watching MORE football, Evie and I are going shopping.  She needs some news shoes for winter, and I need some new sunglasses because she broke my last pair.

I'm sure we'll have another fun mommy/daughter day!!

My growing girl

 

I love how you can look at the world as though it's one big mystery to be solved.  I love how you study new objects as though they are from a foreign planet.  I love to wonder what you must be thinking.  Your dad and I like to narrate for you.  :)

I  love your determination.  When you fall down, you get up and try again.  We something seems out of reach, you reach farther. You inspire me to work hard to reach my goals too. 

More than anything else, I love the person you are becoming.  Your sense of humor, spirit, and personality amaze me everyday.  I hope you follow your dreams and always stay true to yourself. 

When you grow up...

Mi hijita,

As each milestone passes, I know that you are one step closer to being your own independent person.  I try not to mourn the passing of each stage, and I also try not to hope for unpleasant stages to pass either.  I try to enjoy each moment as it happens. 

As much as I attempt that, whenever I look at you, I can't help but think about the future... 

Could you be a piano prodigy?

 Could you be the star of your high school basketball team?  (If that happens, you DEFINITELY didn't inherit those genes from your mama, trust me!!)

Could you find the cure for some horrible disease?

Could you be a great friend/mother/wife?

Of course I've dreamed of what you'll be, but what I want most for you is happiness

...whatever that looks like for you. 

This post was written as part of the Breastfeeding Blog Hop... 

which is open to ALL mamas 

and has nothing to do with breastfeeding this week!!!  

If you'd like to link up, go to Life with Levi and add your blog to list!!

The Gender Guessing Game

When I was pregnant with Evie, we decided not to find out the gender of the baby.  I had always wanted it to be surprise when the baby was born.  Hearing M tell me that we had a daughter was one the coolest experiences of my life; I wouldn't change it for the world.

Because we didn't know, I constantly wondered, "Boy or girl???"  I read all of the old wives tales.  I even went so far as to test them on my sister-in-law, who knew she was having a boy, so that I could see if they actually worked.  (Some did, but they also said I was having a boy...Evie is definitely a girl.) 

Most of the time that I was pregnant, I thought I was having a boy.  That's what my instinct told me, but in reality I think I was hoping for a boy.  I'm sorry if that makes me a bad person, let me finish explaining...  Having a daughter scared the crap out of me for several reasons, including:

• Middle school
• Princess stuff
• Girl body image problems - I've had enough of my own, I don't want to see my daughter go through it too
• Self image in general
• The color pink
• How girls treat other girls
• How boys treat girls
• Barbie, or even worse, Bratz
• Snotty teenage girls

The list could go on and on.  I also worried about how M would react to having a daughter.  He is from a very male-dominant family.  He has one sister who is much younger than him, and she was always coddled and treated so differently because she's a girl.  I feared that he would feel that our daughter couldn't do certain things "because she's a girl." 

After she was born, most of my apprehension went away.  I'll be scared of being the mom of a middle school girl forever.  I teach  middle school.  I know how horribly mean they are to each other, and to pretty much everyone around them.   But I realize now that we all go through it, and we all survive.  All I can do is be there for her through it all.

I feel like I've turned completely 180 degrees.  Now, I am concerned that if I have a son, I wouldn't be able to have the same bond with him.  I only have sisters, so I've never seen the mother/son bond in action from that point of view.  I know that Evie and I will have rough patches, all mothers and daughters do.  I will do my best to help her make it through the times when it's tough being a girl.