Thursday, September 1, 2011

Back to School/Daycare/Rambling

School started today!  Well, I've back at work for a couple of days, but today was the first day for kids all over Wisconsin.  It was nice to see my students again.  Because I'm in such a small school district, I teach a lot of the kids each year when they are in 7th through 10th grade.  I really get to know them and it's fun to hear what they've been up to over the summer.  They get to know me personally too, and many of them were excited to hear about my summer with the baby. 

Evie has been doing very well at daycare the past few days.  She hasn't bitten anyone...not that I know of!  (See post below for more info.)  She has been eating and napping well, and she's been tuckered out each night too!!  Our daycare provider works out of her home, and she has Evie and three other little ones full time.  A few more kids are there after school each day too.  I think that Evie enjoys the time with the other kids, and I think she's been worn out from playing all day!

We really like our daycare, but sometimes I just have an unsettled feeling about it.  Don't misunderstand, she does a great job.  She is caring, experienced, a great mom to her own teenage daughters, but I always worry that something won't go quite right.  I'm a worrier to the core.  I worry about EVERYTHING, and having a child has made me an even bigger worrier. 

A few weeks ago I was having a mini-meltdown about Evie going back to daycare and M said, "You really won't be happy unless you are the only one taking care of her."  I was taken aback, but he's right.  No matter how great our babysitter is, I'll always feel guilty about leaving her and I'll wish that I was with her.  And honestly, what mother doesn't believe that she would take the best care of her own child???

 I'm fortunate that my job allows me the time that I have with Evie.  I'm also fortunate that I love my job.  I guess it's just the age-old struggle of a working mom.  Wherever I am, I will probably always feel like I'm supposed to be doing my other job.

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